Why Drive Yourself Crazy When You Can Drive Yourself Sane

Facing Your Fears: 3 Critical Questions

When considering facing our fears, we can often find ourselves locked in a paralytic posture waiting for the next wind to blow us over. I want to share three points and 3 key questions to ask if you want to overcome your fear.

While it is always an accomplishment to overcome a fear, it's important to identify WHY you want or need to overcome one. For example, riding a roller coaster is entertainment but a fear of speaking in public can prevent you from succeeding in your career.
The feeling of accomplishment that comes from conquering a fear is one of life's most empowering experiences. It shows that you have courage within you that you may not have recognized. It can become a metaphor for accomplishing other goals, like finishing a major project, or a lifestyle habit like stopping smoking. It also empowers your children to see their mom no longer afraid.

When I was 8 years old, I was thrown from a horse in summer camp. I did what everyone said I should do: I got back on the horse and rode for the rest of the summer. But the following summer, I froze! I avoided anything to do with horses until my daughter turned 3 years old and wanted to ride a pony. As much as I wanted to ride behind her on an old mare who was clearly harmless, I stood frozen and unable to put my foot in the stirrups. I was ashamed of my fear and suddenly decided that I would overcome it because I did not want her to see mommy scared of a horse. Nor did I want her to catch my fear.

I sought professional help that weekend and the following Saturday, much to her delight, mommy rode around the ring behind her. The stablemaster said I was a funny shade of green but I did it...and our family was able to take up horseback riding as an activity!
If your New Year's resolution is to overcome a specific fear, the most effective way is to seek professional help from a therapist who specializes and phobias and fears. There are new treatments that work in one to three sessions! You can find a directory of therapists with their specializations at www.psychologytoday.com , a site that is networked to 100's of other health sites such as WebMD, US News and World Report, and Dr. Andrew Weill's website.

Before consulting a therapist, make a list of your questions and replies to the following:

1. How long have you had the fear?
2. When and how did it start?
3. What have you done in the past to overcome the fear? How will it change your life when you no longer have this fear?

I chose this specialty because I had to overcome my fear or public speaking in order to promote my first book. The powerful techniques I learned inspired me to reach out to others. I have helped thousands of people replace their fears with calm and confidence.

One more thought: If you do not overcome this fear, what do you expect will happen....or not happen? Riding a rollercoaster may not be essential to your survival. However, if you are afraid to drive or ride in a car because you were in an accident, or you suffered a traumatic medical experience and are unable to go to the doctor when you need treatment, your fear is affecting your survival. Put any of those fears at the top of your list for 2009.

If you can not afford therapy, then you may want to consider purchasing a copy of "Why Drive Yourself Crazy, When You Can Drive Yourself Sane," a simple, yet practical and powerful set of tools to help you gain control of your thinking and emotions for better results.

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